video Keep your damn stumps!

oatmeal muffinDecember 19 is Oatmeal Muffin Day.

As Seinfeld viewers know, it’s better not to assume that homeless people want the stumps of your muffin after you’ve eaten the top. I’d say that goes double if it’s an oatmeal muffin.

Below, “Rebecca De Mornay” from the homeless shelter reads Elaine the riot act for leaving muffin stumps at the shelter. The tops had been skimmed off to be sold at the “Top o’ the Muffin to You!” shop in which Elaine was an investor.

Clip from Seinfeld, “The Muffin Tops” (May 8, 1997)

REBECCA DE MORNAY: Are you the ones leaving those muffin pieces behind our shelter?

ELAINE: You’ve been enjoying them?

REBECCA DE MORNAY: They’re just stumps!

ELAINE: Well, they’re perfectly edible.

REBECCA DE MORNAY: Oh, so you just assume that the homeless will eat them? They’ll eat anything?

MR LIPPMAN: No, we just thought—

REBECCA DE MORNAY: I know what you thought! They don’t have homes! They don’t have jobs!  What do they need the top of a muffin for? They’re lucky to get the stumps!

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